"Without you I wouldn't have been able to do anything"

11

Jul
2011

'WITHOUT YOU I WOULDN'T...'


HELLO,
F
R
I
E
N
D
S......

@PAULUSA..7.29...I KNOW, I WAS WISHING YOU A HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY
BUT YOU COULDN'T READ MY LIPS....WELL A BELATED INDEPENDENCE DAY
AS I THINK IT WAS THE DAY BEFORE...

@GAILCONNELY...4.46....BLESS YOU GAIL ..BUT WE JUST DON'T
AND WE'RE MEN WITH BABIES AND WIVES WITH A FEW YEARS
EXPERIENCE NOW... THE WORLD IS A VERY BIG PLACE...
AND WE'RE VERY HAPPY WITH OUR JOB..TRYING TO MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY
EVERYWHERE WOULD HAVE THE ADVERSE EFFECT ...
A MILLION  APOLOGIES X

ON THE SUBJECT OF SWEARING AND CHILDREN
SEPARATE TO ME AND THIS WEEK...

DO YOU THINK MOTHERS/FATHERS ARE MORE BOTHERED ABOUT
WHAT OTHER PARENTS WILL THINK THAN THEIR KID ACTUALLY SWEARING?

I WAS BORN AND RAISED (FOR THE FIRST 3 YEARS OF MY LIFE IN A PUB)
HERE IT IS.....


ONE OF MY FIRST WORDS WAS FUCK...
AND ONE OF MY FIRST SENTENCES WAS
"GIVE ME A FUCKING HARVEY WALL BANGER,PLEASE"

Harvey Wallbanger - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

FYI,I DIDN'T GET ONE....

JONNY AND NICKY LET ME BABY SIT ONCE....WITH LITTLE MICKEY
I TAUGHT HIM A GAME CALLED "IT'S THE SHIT!" IT INVOLVED THROWING A SOCK OVER
THE BALCONY...AND SHOUTING "IT'S THE SHIT" EVERY TIME IT LANDED...

THEY WEREN'T HAPPY........I WONDER WHAT I'LL THINK WHEN MY LITTLE ONES ASK TO
WATCH DORA THE 'FUCKING' EXPLORA ?AND AYDA LOOKS AT ME SHAKING HER HEAD...


@JESPER75..8.35...GOOD IDEA,,,MAYBE IN A FEW YEARS..

@TANYADEACON....5.35...AND PEOPLE ARE ASKING IF IT'S ME OR NOT
THAT'S REPLYING ......I CAN'T REMEMBER YOU BEING OTT? YOU LOOKED
CHUFFED …I'M PROUD TO BE THE CONDUIT FOR A GOOD CHUFFING...
AND NO I WON'T BE GETTING THE BLACK FILL IN PART JUST THE
PYRAMID AND THE UFOS IN BLACK...IN THE PLACE I SHOWED YOU....

@MARKJAMESMOBILEALABAMA...2.40 HOWDY MY FRIEND...
WEIRD STORY ABOUT CURSED...IT WAS ABOUT A CLOSE FRIEND OF MINE....
SHE WAS SOMETHING OF A CELEBRITY IN THESE PARTS......HELLA INTELLIGENT,
BEAUTIFUL AND VERY FUNNY...GREAT COMPANY...ANYWAY SHE WAS TAKEN AWAY FROM US
AND HER FAMILY AT A VERY YOUNG AGE...SHE WOULD HAVE BEEN AT THE CONCERTS
HAD SHE STILL BEEN AROUND...THE WEIRD BIT....BEFORE IT WAS RELEASED
I WAS IN SWITZERLAND WALKING FROM MY HOTEL TO GET SOME BOOTS FITTED FOR SKIING....
AS I AMBLED TO THE BOOT SHOP I STARTED TO SING IT TO MYSELF....I ALL MOST FAINTED
WHEN I ENTERED THE SHOP AND SAT NEXT TO HER HUSBAND….WEIRD NO?

@FREDDIE1200...NO IT DOESN'T BUT I HOPE YOU GET THE CHANCE TO FIND OUT
GOOD LUCK BUDDY X

@SARAHLSTH.,...THE ROCK AND ROLL CLOCK? I KNOW WHAT TO CALL IT NOW ...THANK YOUR MAN...

@THESPIANGIRL1...1.20AM PYGMALION...OHH THAT'S A DEEP ONE...YEAH YOU'RE RIGHT WITH ALL OF THE ABOVE
IT LEAD ME TO MANY FRIGHTENING PLACES ...BUT THIS IS NOW MY TRUTH....

You have to become a reliable person. You don’t have to be relied on for everything, yet you do have to be relied on that you will respond to life in a circumspect way. You have to be counted on to be considerate. You have to be counted on to consider another. You have to be responsible for your actions. You have to be counted on to not find excuses for what, all in all, may be less than illuminated behavior. Even kindness is not to be random but to be counted on. You have to be counted on to be responsible for what you say and what you do.

You have to be counted on to not test the limits of friendship. You have to be counted on to not make excuses for lapses.

Be reliable in your willingness to grow. Unless you are responsible for your present reactions to life, how then will you grow? If someone else is responsible for all that you bring on yourself, then you hide from yourself and are being irresponsible.

Patterns in your life are patterns in your life. They are your patterns. They are your doing. It must be that you set yourself up. Why would you do that? And why would you set yourself up and pretend that what you incited you are entirely innocent of? Why would you pretend you are not responsible? Who is responsible for you if you are not? Do not hold fate responsible for your actions and reactions.

You are no longer a baby who is carried here and there and put down here and there. You now have free will. Now you have responsibility for your own life.

No longer can it be that patterns in your life are someone else’s doing. They are your doing, beloveds. There are actions you have taken, or actions you have not taken. It is your initiating or your allowing. And it is for you to undo unhelpful patterns in your life. Old patterns are old patterns. You do not have to keep them. You are responsible. Be a responsible person.

That you are innocent does not mean that you are not responsible. If you are cheated all the time, you are the one who is allowing yourself to be cheated. If you are misunderstood all the time, you have allowed yourself to be misunderstood. You don’t have to change the understanding of those around you. You have to change your understanding of yourself. You are the one who doesn’t understand. This has to be, or the same patterns in your life would not be repeated. You are the one who has to change.

I am telling you to stand up. You are not a victim. If you are a victim, you claimed the title. You put on the hat you are wearing. You are a crook of your own good fortune. You have stolen from yourself.

Ultimately, you have to take responsibility for yourself. The world may be mistaken, yet that does not take away your responsibility for yourself. You don’t have to kowtow to the world. At the same time, you don’t have to rebel against the world. You don’t have to put yourself in front of a moving car.

That may be what you have been doing, and then you blame the driver.

Consider that in life, you are crossing a street. Look both ways. Look both ways, and pay attention to what you see. Patterns in your life are not to be shrugged at.

@MICHELLE-JONES 1.10AM...COOL ,SEE YOU IN THE ASTRAL,....
@ELLI..1..1.41...COURSE I REMEMBER
@SAMMYMAY19197...YEAH A LONE MAN...I THOUGHT THAT'S HOW AN EPISODE OF CSI STARTS.....
@KIROKI....10.52....I DIDN'T KNOW THERE WAS

OH FOR ANYONE ASKING ABOUT THE BIRMINGHAM GIGS I DID DO A BLOG FOR THOSE TWO NIGHTS...
BUT WAS DEEMED BY JOSIE TO BE A BIT TOO HONEST..(IMAGINE THAT)..NOT ABOUT THE SHOWS OR THE CROWDS
JUST THE TRAIN OF THOUGHT IT LED ME INTO….FIRST NIGHT AT BIRMINGHAM WAS AS GOOD AS ANYWHERE
WE'VE BEEN THE FACT THE BUILDING SQUASHED EVERYONE IN HELPED.....
THE SECOND NIGHT ....I JUST DIDN'T FEEL UP TO THE TASK..ONE OF THOSE DAYS I GUESS...
BUT I WORKED HARD TO GIVE THEM WHAT THEY'D HAD THE NIGHT BEFORE ...AND I THINK I PULLED IT OFF.....
THANKS BRUM...

@CARNSPINDLE10.55...YES I DID FALL ..BUT I FALL IN THE SAME PLACE EVERY NIGHT  ; )
@LLAMAHONEY..19..10.44..BERTIE...
@MARRIUS..9.02...I DON'T KNOW REALLY MAYBE TO BE GOOD IN A RELATIONSHIP?
@RICARDA6..SAVE YOURSELF THE JOURNEY MATE,,,I WON'T BE IN THE BAR
AND BEER? YOU KNOW I HAVEN'T DRANK FOR 11 YEARS DON'T YOU....?  : )

@TRACYHERRIOT...12.17...APOLOGIES ACCEPTED ABOUT THE DOUBLE TRIPLE QUAD POSTS....

YOU POSE AN INTERESTING QUESTION THAT I GUESS MOST FRIENDS WOULD LIKE TO KNOW THE ANSWER TO
SO HERE GOES....

WHAT DO WE THINK?
WE THINK ALL MANNER OF DIFFERENT THINGS...
YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND WE DON'T FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT US THAT YOU DO...
IT'S A SOURCE OF CONSTANT BEMUSEMENT THAT WE STILL HAVE TROUBLE WRAPPING OUR HEADS AROUND SOMETIMES...

BACK IN THE DAY WHEN I DIDN'T LIKE ME...HOW COULD I LET YOU IN?
I JUST DIDN'T GET IT ...I'VE NEVER EXPERIENCED WHAT IT'S LIKE TO HAVE SO MUCH DEDICATION
AND ENTHUSIASM FOR SOMEONE I'VE NEVER MET.OR MET FOR THAT MATTER,,...IT USED TO STRIKE ME AS ODD.......
BUT THINGS HAVE CHANGED

A LOVELY OLD ACTOR WHO I USED TO GO TO FOR ADVICE  GAVE ME TWO NUGGETS THAT
I NOW COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND..

1. "YOU ARE NOT THERE TO BE ENTERTAINED"
2. "LOVE YOUR AUDIENCE"

..I TRIED BACK IN THE DAY TO REACH OUT TO YOU ALL
BUT IT TURNED TO SHIT....THE END RESULT WAS MY CHAT ROOM CLOSING AND ME
LEAVING WITH A VERY BAD TASTE IN MY MOUTH,,,,HOW WAS I TO DECIPHER WHO'S WHO?

WHAT DO I THINK NOW?

YOUR REACTIONS TO WHAT I'M DOING ..YOUR NODS,YOUR WINKS,YOUR GO 'ARN ROBBIE'S
YOUR SMILES YOUR ACCEPTANCE YOUR ADORATION THE FACT THAT I KNOW I'M TOUCHING YOUR SOUL,
YOUR TEARS...THAT WILD LOOK OF ABANDONMENT ..THE FACT THAT I'M USING YOUR ENERGY WHEN I HAVE NON
OF MINE....THE BANNERS...THE RW T-SHIRTS..THE RW HATS ; ).....THOSE KNOWING LOOKS I GET ...THE PRIDE IN YOUR EYES....

THE  TRUTH IS ....WITHOUT YOU I WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN ABLE TO DO ANYTHING.....
THAT PASSION ALWAYS TRANSLATED SOMEWHERE IN THE DEEPEST RECESSES .....

UNDERNEATH MY DOUBTS YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN THERE
I SEE YOU NOW....I HEAR YOU NOW....

WHEN MY ACTOR FRIEND TOLD ME TO "LOVE MY AUDIENCE"
I THOUGHT HE WAS BEING A LUVVEE AND TAKING HIMSELF TOO SERIOUSLY....

I NOW REALISE BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT THAT I WASN'T TAKING MYSELF SERIOUSLY ENOUGH.....

HOW COULD THIS MAGIC BELONG TO ME?
IT CAME SO NATURALLY HOW COULD I QUANTIFY WHAT IT WAS?
IT ISN'T TANGIBLE YOU CAN'T TAKE IT TO THE DRESSING ROOM TO LOOK AT IT.....
YOU DON'T COME FIRST..IT ISN'T THE OLYMPICS OR GOLF...
YOU CAN'T HOLD IT WHEN YOU'RE LOOKING IN A MIRROR  JUDGING YOURSELF HARSHLY......

AS I MAKE FRIENDS WITH MYSELF....I SUPPOSE IT'S ONLY NATURAL THAT I MAKE FRIENDS WITH YOU.....

HEY..?CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT I CAN ACHIEVE NOW? THE FUTURE'S BRIGHT...

I'VE JUST DELETED A FEW THNGS AND READ THAT BACK….IT'S NOW SO RANDOM
BUT I'M TOO TIRED TO EDIT AND TOO IMPATIENT NOT TO PRESS SEND ON THIS BLOGG..
BUT I THINK YOU GET THE POINT...

NEXT BLOGG...ADDICTION BLOGG

@SMOGRIDGE…THE ALBUM WAS A CD AND BOOK ABOUT SINATRA...THANK YOU WHO EVER THAT WAS X

@MERECEDESH10.15…LOVE THE WAY YOUR WORDS DANCE OFF THE SCREEN MY FRIEND....'
"I GUESS WE NEED A STRICT DRAMA-FILLED NARRATIVE FROM WHICH NOTHING NOT EVEN THE TRUTH CAN DEVIATE"
YES WHEN I BUY INTO IT THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I'M DOING TOO....I GOT RID OF ALL THE MY "DRAMA" FRIENDS
A FEW YEARS AGO....CUT OUT ANYONE NEGATIVE TO MY NARRATIVE...DRAMA WILL PROBABLY BE MY LAST
ADDICTION TO GO....I HAD NO ONE TO BE ANGRY WITH FOR A WHILE AND IT CONFUSED ME ; )
SOUNDS MIGHTY HOT DOWN THERE ......SAY HELLO TO THE STRAY FROM ME X

@KBAINES...DO I LISTEN TO MY OLD ALBUMS...?
TO BE HONEST I WRITE SO MUCH AND SO OFTEN
THAT I'M ALWAYS LISTENING TO WHAT'S COMING NEXT...
BUT I DO RETURN TO RUDEBOX QUITE A BIT...

@ROBBIEWILLIAMS@HELPLIP...10.06...PRE GIG RITUAL?
PASTA AT 5...5.30...SHOWER AT 7 ...MOUTHWASH WHILST SHOWERING
....THEN SHAVE...GET GIG UNDIES AND TROUSERS ON....
LIZ THEN DOES MY HAIR....WHILE I BRUSH MY TEETH....
I THEN GET "SKIPPY" TO TAPE MY IN EARS TO MY BACK....
RETURN TO LIZ...GET MY EYE BAGS MAKE'UPPED….
....THEN JACKY TOUR MANAGER SAYS "TIME TO GO"...
WE GET IN A VAN AND DRIVE ROUND TO THE BACK STAGE ....
I THEN HIGH FIVE ALL THE DANCERS....THEN ALL THE CREW...
THE FIVE OF US HUDDLE AND SAY A FEW WORDS...THEN THE BOYS WALK THROUGH
THE BACK,...I WATCH THEM EVERY NIGHT...
THEN I CENTER MYSELF AND JUMP...

@ALI83X...12.01....YES IT DOES MAKE TOTAL SENSE...
THERE ARE NO WORDS I CAN OFFER TO DO YOU JUSTICE
BUT I CAN SEND YOU MY LOVE AND MY SINCERE BEST WISHES....
WELCOME BACK ANGEL ....XXXXXXXXXXX

@SHEP..11.47...THAT WOULD MEAN THAT EVERYONE WHO FOLLOWED A FOOTBALL
TEAM IS A STALKER TOO...SO THAT MAKES ME ONE ...

@WICKED76...11.39...SAME AS YOU

@LOVECOOKIES...11.33...RE..ESCAPOLOGY...I'LL TRY MY BEST..
RE WRECKING THE BLOG.,..I TRULY HOPE NOT...BUT I FEAR IT MAY BE "IN THE POST"
XX

@GILLSBILLS…11.19..IT'S JUST A BUMP NOW

@ELVIS 1990..11.18...I HAVEN'T WATCHED IT FOR THAT REASON

@NIC NIC..11.15 THE LYRICS WERE WRITTEN IN MY SISTER'S BACK GARDEN
IN STOKE...
SHE'D WRITTEN A POEM AND THE WORDS…'BREATHS FLESH TO MY BONES…'
WERE IN THE POEM.. I TOOK IT FROM THERE

@SJANEELE.....11.09....THANKS BAB..GET THE KETTLE ON...
YES I DO FIND IT VERY DIFFICULT ..IT'S A CONCENTRATION
THING THAT I'M NOT VERY GOOD AT...

@MAGIC,,11.04...YEAH "WILL" MY NICKNAME AT SCHOOL///

@YOURFRIENDML...11.00PM I'M GUTTED TOO LOVED HIS LEAD
ON THE CIRCUS TOUR...SO COMMANDING...

@NATHANJAY10.57..SORRY I DIDN'T GET BACK TO YOU...
I MEANT WHAT I SAID ABOUT THE VOCAL...BUT LIFE
GETS IN THE WAY OF KEEPING UP WITH THINGS..
I LOVE YOUR STUFF BTW...

@MOOMOO...10.41..MY PIMP WON'T LET ME GO?HAHA!
MY FIRST SONG MUSIC AND WORDS..VERY DRAMATIC...AND SAD ; )

@BUFFY...BLESSINGS DARLING X

@ROBBIE'SANGEL...GOOD MOVES BABA...
ACCEPT ACCEPT ACCEPT....MOVE ON....

@ZARAANDERSON_1..10.34...OF COURSE IT DOES
I'M NOT YODA ; )BUT I DO HAVE A VOLUME CONTROL NOW...
AND IT IS STILL A CHOICE...I AM A DRAMA ADDICT AFTER ALL

@GEM83...10.34 OF COURSE YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN UPSET
IT'S LIKE SOMEONE PISSING ON YOUR TEDDY BEAR
CONSIDER THIS THE DRY CLEANERS...X

@EXAN...10.46...YES I WAS

@ORLYSHKA...10.30 OF COURSE I KNEW WHAT FLAG IT WAS...XXXXX

@ALLISON..10.29THANKS FOR YOUR HEART BAB...I NEEDED IT THEN...
YOUR MORE THAN WELCOME TO  LOVE HIM NOW XX

@CHRISSYLRL..10.24...LOVE THE IN "AN OBSESSED FAN WAY…"
"I'M NOT A STALKER" SCARES ME A LITTLE
I ALWAYS TELL
PEOPLE I'M MAD BECAUSE MAD PEOPLE DON'T KNOW....
AND I ASSUME I'M COVERING ALL BASES....
PLUS YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH A HELL OF A LOT IF THEY THINK YOU'RE MAD..X.

@SABINALUCIA...WERE YOU THE ONE THAT WAS SCARED WHEN I SWORE AT THE CROWD....?
BABA I'M SO SORRY THAT  IT SCARED YOU ..THAT'S NOT MY INTENTION AT ALL...I THINK THERE MAY BE
A CULTURAL BARRIER HERE..X

@JOELOVESROB..10.24 RANDOMERS OF THE WORLD UNITE AND TAKE OVER....
TOPE!

@AMBERARNOLD...10.12...STRAIGHT OFF STAGE INTO VAN...GONE..

@LITTLEMISSH...10.02..WHY DIDN'T YOU ; O X

GOT TO GO TO BED NOW...

OFF TO SAN SIRO IN A FEW HOURS !
XXXX